The Latest News Divorce

It might seem as if the term “family lawyer” would be used to describe an attorney who works for everyone in a family or a person who is a member of your family and happens to work as an attorney. Though these scenarios are possible, the term “family lawyer” is actually someone who specializes in family law. The field of family law relates to topics including divorce, custody, visitation rights, spousal and child support, division of assets in divorce, protection from abuse, and paternity issues.

Many family lawyers choose their field because they want to work with the “human side” of the law. It can be extremely challenging to practice family law because attorneys must connect with and support their clients during very emotional times in life. Family lawyers see people at their best and worst, and help these people transition through some of the most challenging phases of life. Despite its challenges, most family lawyers find a great deal of emotional reward in their work.

What Makes a Good Family Lawyer?
Like all attorneys, some family lawyers are more talented and successful than their peers. The best family lawyers have top-notch skills when it comes to negotiation and litigation. They must be good at time management and understand interpersonal communication. In addition to legal counsel, family lawyers often provide emotional support during a client’s most challenging life events. It also helps if a family attorney has an understanding of financial and real estate laws, though most attorneys have a network of expert resources at their disposal when questions arise.

As families continue to evolve, the practice of family law also changes. This includes handling the issues of same sex unions and their resulting families, for which the traditional legal system is still adjusting. Trends in the field of family law also include mediation and collaborative law, a practice that helps couples divorce and legally separate without traditional litigation. A family law attorney’s role is different in cases where collaborative law is used, as opposed to litigation. In some cases, the lawyer might even act as a mediator and work for both partners, as opposed to representing one or the other. It is important to find an attorney that you are comfortable with but has training in these areas. More divorce attorneys are representing that they will follow a collaborative approach but do not truly understand the dynamics nor have they been trained in this discipline.

Nearly 50% of all first marriages end in divorce. The odds are even greater for second and third marriages. Approximately 40% of all couples in the United States are step couples. The ongoing making and breaking of families creates complicated family ties and creates a need for legal protection as things change. Family lawyers provide the guidance and support these changing families need.

Have questions about Family Law or need help in this area, then feel free contact attorney SPIRIO at 631-277-8844.

Unfortunately, this article is correct.  There are many unforeseen and unexpected financial impacts to a dissolution of a marriage.  You should not only be cautious of capital gains implications when selling a marital home, but if the marital home is being transferred to one party, it is important to do a title search to make sure there are no Judgments and Liens, and the party is truly getting the equity that is believed to be the consideration for the transfer in equitable distribution. 

There should be no tax on the equitable distribution of certain assets, but as this article indicates, depending on cost basis and capital gains, significant tax impact consequence could be incurred.  Another good point that this article makes is the true impact of the cost of children.  Child support, although a statutory creature, only covers room and board, which obviously does not cover the myriad of expenses in raising a child, not to mention how those costs increase as the child ages and the ultimate cost of a college education. 

In addition, now that there is no deduction or tax write-off for maintenance, the tax implications are even greater and more must be considered in negotiating a settlement with respect to the tax implications and impact on the parties. 

It is very important to have a skilled attorney and tax expert review your dissolution so you know exactly what you are getting and the tax implications of your decisions.

Selected excerpt(s), photo and linked article courtesy of Chris Taylor, Considerable.com

Concetta Spirio: A compassionate and aggressive lawyer providing the highest level of legal representation for over 30 years.

When you plan to spend the rest of your life with someone, or commit to a long term relationship where you are living under the same roof, you have to recognize it is not going to always be rosy and cheerful.  Conflict is inevitable and is going to happen.  How you handle it and how you go about a resolution is what will determine how your relationship fares.  Long term relationships with two people are complicated.  Adding in kids and financial responsibilities can cause conflicts to multiply exponentially. 

If you actually analyze marital disagreements or spats, they tend to follow a negative trend.  Someone is negative to the other person, the other person becomes defensive and things escalate in a negative manner.  This article explores an interesting way to break that cycle.  They have termed it a “Marriage Hack”.  In essence the parties embrace an idea of a third party.  Although figuratively, the exercise involves once you find yourself in a positional argument, for each to take a step back, take a few minutes and write about the argument and disagreement, not from your own point of view or your partner’s point of view, but from a birds eye view of a neutral third party observing your argument. 

The study conducted over a few years at Northwestern University, shows that utilizing this exercise, many times, brings a clear perspective on what the couple is arguing about and what has triggered the argument.  That opens the door to finding a solution.  It was also interesting that they found that the couples that utilize this technique, not necessarily had less conflict, but that the conflicts did not escalate as far and caused less stress and frustration between the couple.  There is nothing more damaging to a relationship when an argument goes too far in the wrong direction.

Selected excerpt(s), photo and linked article courtesy of Jeremy Brown, Fatherly

Many are experiencing the stress of isolation and uncomfortable 24/7 close confinement with their spouse. For some this is not a problem, but for others it has created strain and rifts within relationships.  For those having difficulty or facing divorce and separation, especially in these times when the courts are not available (except in actual emergencies), there is an alternative that will enable a family to move forward now while saving tremendous time, money and emotional trauma.

People usually think that the major issues for a marriage are infidelity and financial problems, which are often the big ticket items that truly cause the demise of a marriage.  These can obviously obliterate or fatally fracture the foundation of any relationship.  Again, good communication is the cornerstone to maintaining a good foundation and to heal wounds. 

There are also many other small seemingly minor behaviors that can damage a relationship and start the seeds of destruction...it really just takes a little time and effort to pay attention. 

The Gottman Institute has identified what they call the four horseman of the apocalypse and identifies four behaviors that they feel can, with 90% certainty, destroy a marriage.  They are criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling.  The video in the article is a good quick tutorial on examples of those behaviors as well as suggestions for solutions.

Selected excerpt(s) and linked article courtesy of Fatherly, yourtango(dot)com
Royalty-free photo courtesy of Pixabay

Concetta Spirio.  A Compassionate Collaborative Divorce Attorney, Mediator & Peacemaker Providing The Highest Level of Legal Representation For Over 35 Years.

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One of the earlier questions a client usually asks during a consultation for divorce is what are the monetary costs (legal fees) of obtaining a divorce.  The reality is, in New York, the costs for a divorce are slightly higher than the national average.  However, that takes into account that the divorce rate is higher in New York than in other places in the country, as well as the fact that the cost of living and earnings of people in New York are also higher. 

Unfortunately, the process between court fees and the documentation required by the courts in order to grant a divorce cannot be avoided.  Therefore, the actual costs of your divorce will vary, depending on the complexity of your matter as well as which method or process you utilize.  Obviously a highly contested divorce, i.e. with two attorneys fighting every issue out through the court system can become astronomically expensive.  Collaborative divorce and mediation are less expensive and are a much more holistic approach. 

However, when all is said and done, in my opinion and experience, Mediation and the Collaborative process can run about the same.  Again, each case is different and it depends largely upon the complexity of your circumstances i.e. whether there are children, retirement assets, marital assets and debt, etc.

It's important to have the right professional to help you navigate any process.  That is why a collaborative divorce, using collaboratively trained professionals, in my opinion, is the best and most holistic approach and when compared with the alternatives is the most cost effective.

If you have any questions please contact me @ Spiriolaw.com or one of the amazing Collaborative Divorce Professionals @ LICDP.com

Royalty-free photo courtesy of UnSplash

So, have you heard of “The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse”?  Well, a renowned psychologist, after studying couples over fourteen years, was able to identify behaviors that can predict when a marriage would end with astounding precision. He has dubbed the four behaviors as “The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse”.

As this article goes into more detail, the four behaviors are Contempt, Criticism, Defensiveness and Stonewalling. It is a very interesting read. My question to you is, if you see these signs, how would you react and what would/could you do to rectify and save the marriage?

Remember the Collaborative process has professionals to help with any rising conflicts.

Selected excerpt(s) and linked article courtesy of Rebecca Strong, askmen(dot)com
Royalty-free photo courtesy of Pixabay

Concetta Spirio.  A Compassionate Collaborative Divorce Attorney, Mediator & Peacemaker Providing The Highest Level of Legal Representation For Over 35 Years.

#Concetta #ConcettaSpirio #ConcettaLaw #SpirioLaw #Marriage #Divorce #RealEstate #Litigation #Wills #Trusts #Estates #Mediation #CollaborativeDivorce #LongIsland #Suffolk #Nassau #Islip #Sayville #LGBT

This article talks about a “gray divorce”.  A “gray divorce” refers to divorces that occur later in life and involve spouses who are 50 years or older. 

Divorce is difficult at any age, but a gray divorce can have its own specific challenges.  Many times the plans for retirement and finances to sustain retirement are part of a complex long term plan, involving both people and their individual assets.  Looking to separate and divide retirement assets may not afford each person of the couple to live as they intended in retirement.  This obviously creates its own unique set of challenges as well as emotions. 

Other than losing a spouse or a child, a divorce sometimes is the most traumatic and painful experience one can have in life.  The emotions that are typically involved can be exacerbated when dealing with an older individual, whom many times have been married for more than half of their life.

There is also a great misconception on how a “gray divorce” affects adult children.  Many times our perception is that adult children are in a better position to handle divorce.  Although that may be the case, many times and more often than not, adult children have as much trauma in navigating their parents divorce as do young children. 

This article examines five common reasons why gray divorce happens to older couples.  As in any divorce, you need the proper professionals to help you navigate such a difficult process.  This is why collaborative divorce and the professionals of the Long Island Collaborative Divorce Professionals are best suited and trained to help couples through this difficult time and help find creative solutions.  No matter what age, put yourselves in the best hands to navigate your divorce with integrity and dignity.  We are here to answer any questions you may have.

Selected excerpt(s) and linked article courtesy of Babita Spinelli of YourTango.com
Royalty-free photo courtesy of UnSplash

Concetta Spirio.  A Compassionate Collaborative Divorce Attorney, Mediator & Peacemaker Providing The Highest Level of Legal Representation For Over 34 Years.

#Concetta #ConcettaSpirio #ConcettaLaw #SpirioLaw #Marriage #Divorce #RealEstate #Litigation #Wills #Trusts #Estates #Mediation #CollaborativeDivorce #LongIsland #Suffolk #Nassau #Islip #Sayville #LGBT #GrayDivorce